First you have to wake up. No matter how comfortable you’re sleeping.
You have to wake up!
No more living in a “someday I’m going to do that” world.
Someday is now. It’s today.
I know it’s a lot more comfortable to stay sleeping in your nice comfy bed, where you can just imagine all the great things you’re going to do in the future. But that’s not going to make it happen.
So stop dreaming about what you want to do, because if you don’t wake up and start doing it, it’ll never happen.
If dreams are a wish your heart makes when you’re asleep, what happens when you wake up? Does the dream just disappear, forgotten, until you dream it again?
Isn’t it time to make that dream come true?
Then wake up. Stay awake. Make your bed. And work on that dream!
It’s hard to believe that this particular post was written six years ago. So much has happened since then, and I’ve updated it accordingly, including some new pictures, but one thing remains the same. He’s still the leader if the flock!
Or shall I say the “unofficial” leader of the flock! After all, the real leader of the flamingo flock has to have his very own pink feathers! Feathers that grow on him naturally, that is!
But how many guys can actually claim to be an honorary member of the flock? It takes a special guy to have that honor bestowed upon him.
First of all, he has to like pink. Actually he has to like wearing pink! And that’s one thing he’s never minded. He has pink sweaters, pink shirts, and of course certain pink flamingo tropical shirts! Not to mention the glasses, and the hats, and, well, then there are the lights…..
He has to like shrimp, and of course that’s one of his favorite foods. Fortunately eating them hasn’t turned him pink yet, but you never know…! He could wake up one morning with pink hair! Yes, I’ve threatened this over the years, but never done it….YET
And he has to be a fan of pink wine or pink champagne, or at the least margaritas! And since he does prefer White Zinfandel, which is sort of pink, the flamingos took the opportunity to get some special wine for him for his birthday! Sure hope he likes it!
And since flamingos are quite creative, especially when it comes to decorating and party planning, the leader of the flock needs a bit of a flair for decorating, and, he is known for his talent at decorating the foyer ledge for Christmas and other seasonal events. Plus, the pool parties we used to have every year are renown for not only the food, but the costume contests, the festive decorating, and of course, the extremely talented bartenders! And let’s not forget our beloved Rusty the Golden Retriever Flamingo! Even though he has now crossed over the Rainbow Bridge, I have a feeling he’s having Pink Flamingo Pool Parties with his friends, making new traditions and enjoying a truly fantastic and specially designed flamingo pool just for him!
Flamingo parties were so much fun! and I’ve updated some of the flamingo picture gallery, just because I can!
I think by now we all know who we’re talking about. Who else but our very own Ben, who actually began the flamingo madness at our house and invited those fabulous pink birds to take up permanent residence! In fact, they were invited for the Great Flamingo Fly-In on his 60th birthday, and they just never left! Even after 13 years, (how can it be that long?) they’re still hanging around.
So in honor of his special day, the flamingos decided to have another flamingo birthday party for him. Only the very best for the Leader of the Flock, of course! And don’t feel bad if you didn’t get an invitation, because they only invited him, me, and all of the other flamingos and their friends!
There will be presents galore, we’re sure! All manner of flamingo gifts and gadgets to go with his growing collection (like he needs more)! He can always use more flamingo wine stoppers, wine glasses, and of course an extra set of flamingo dinnerware to use by the pool this summer for those special evenings with his closest flamingo friends who’ll join him for grilled shrimp and margaritas.
And what’s a birthday party without a birthday cake? And for this occasion, they decided to have a birthday cake contest, and they’d select the best five cakes to present to him! Of course, what he doesn’t know is that the flamingos’ way of presenting birthday cakes involves a bit of tossing and smashing, especially when it’s for a really special person! And especially when the flamingos have had an extra glass of wine or two! And the icing just may turn that hair pink!
Which one of these do you think he’d like the best?
So Ben, you’d better be prepared, because when the flamingos are involved, you just never know what will happen!!
And who knows? Maybe this summer we’ll try one more flamingo pool party, and yes, with all three of our grandchildren dressed in flamingo attire, including our newest grandson, Ryan. (Sorry Chris, but for this one day he’ll have to go along with the theme and wear something flamingoish. He’ll only be eight months old by then, and he’ll enjoy it!)
So Happy Birthday to the Leader of the Flock! And a really good sport!
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As you certainly know by now, flamingos are extremely social birds. They can’t resist a good party, and the more flamboyant the better! So when they heard about Mardi Gras, well….you can only imagine their reaction. Talk about a party designed with them in mind….!
So they set out to plan their Mardi Gras celebration. Which of course had to be bigger and better than the ones they’d heard about in New Orleans! After all, they have a reputation to maintain for party planning….whether they’d ever been to a Mardi Gras celebration or not.
They did their research on line with their pink iPads (well actually they borrowed mine since it has a pink cover), and came up with some absolutely perfect Mardi Gras party plans…flamingo style, of course!
And since Mardi Gras parties are filled with glitter and feathers and all manner of gaudy, flashy and flamboyant decor, it was their idea of a perfect party! And they set to work to plan the ultimate Mardi Gras festivity!
The guest list was easy, and the invitations were simple to create! And as with their many other parties, everyone quickly accepted, because they knew the flamingos threw the best parties in town! Then they set to work selecting decorations, planning their menu and their special drinks, hiring a band, and of course, planning the most elaborate costumes and Mardi Gras masks they could design! (With prizes for the best ones, of course!)
Their masks were amazing! Lots of feathers and sequins and glitter. Lots of pink, although there were a few of the traditional colors thrown in as well. They figured a little purple, gold, and green did blend rather nicely with their favorite shades of pink. What do you think of their choices? And which one would you select as the winner?
And then there were the ropes of beads! Lots and lots of them! In a rainbow of colors….not just the traditional colors, but of course lots of pink sparkly beads, many with fun flamingo figurines on them, of course! They even hung some of those necklaces around the house in strategic places as decorations, and on the front door.
The flaminguys had to have top hats to go with their formal attire, of course. Formal attire for a guy flamingo, being a pink bow tie, vest, and cummerbund. With a pink rose pinned to their lapel…in this case, with the roses sprinkled with glitter!
Decorating was easy. It always is for the flamingos, you know; they’re known for their flashy but stylish decorating skills! And since just about anything goes for Mardi Gras, well, they certainly outdid themselves!
With fancy feathered and beaded chair covers, shiny beaded chandeliers, and tables set with flowers and beads, and beaded wine bottles, well, let’s just say the attendees said they’d never seen a Mardi Gras party as spectacular this one!
And the menu…let’s start with the bar, because after all, Marci Gras is known for the amazing libations, along with the amazing creole cuisine and amazing King cakes.
The flamingos were certain to have the most unique, most original libations to be found! Their version of the popular Marci Gras Hurricane was a work of art, with their own special blend of several flavors of rum, passion fruit syrup, lime juice, and of course their own touch of pink fruit juice that they just will not share! Topped off with slices of lime and orange slices, and a couple of maraschino cherries for the final garnish, well let’s say each drink was a work of art, and served in hand-painted (or rather, wing-painted) glasses that were given to each guest as a party souvenir.
And of course, their menu included their favorite shrimp dishes, along with some Cajun crawfish, red beans and rice, and a few surprises they begged us not to reveal. After all, flamingos have to have a few secrets, only to be shared with other flamingos.
Their grand dessert finale was the traditional King Cake….flamingo style. Traditionally the King Cake is a round cake confection decorated with sugared icing in the Mardi Gras colors of green, gold, and purple. The cake itself may be colored as well, or it may contain apple, cream cheese, or other fillings. It usually contains a small figurine of the Baby Jesus, although today the figurines can be any number of different items. But only one, because tradition says that whoever gets the figurine in their slice provides the cake for next year’s party.
Naturally the flamingos just weren’t satisfied with the traditional one layer cake, so they contacted their favorite flamingo cake artist, and he was able to provide several beautifully decorated cakes (as well as some special Mardi Gras cookies) for the event. And what was baked inside each one? Why a plastic flamingo statuette! What else?!
It wouldn’t be a Mardi Gras party without some New Orleans jazz, though, and let’s just say this…if you’ve never heard the amazing King Creole Funky Flamingo Five, you haven’t heard jazz! Flamingo style, of course!
With Fancy Catfish Fred on trumpet (he’s the one wearing the sequined catfish on his derby hat!). Long Tall Louie on trombone, with his hanging flamingo charms clipped on his trombone slide. Saucy Shrimpy Sal on saxophone, a legend for the amount of shrimp he can consume at one meal (and we hear he’s been known to stash a few shrimp in the bell of his sax, just in case he needs a snack while performing!).
Then there’s Fletch “The Stretch” on sousaphone, who’s known for his ability to stretch some of the most amazing melodies out of that instrument! Watching Fletch perform is always a treat!
Last but certainly not least, we have Lester “Skinny Legs” Lawrence the Liberace of the snare drum, famous for his flowing multi-colored feathered robes!
And they used the occasion to introduce their newest members, Marvelous Matilda and her twin sister Amazing Miss Mavis. Matilda is a delightfully talented flamingo keyboard artist extraordinaire whose feathertips can tickle those keys like no other! And Miss Mavis’ vocal talents are truly amazing! Guess they’ll have to change the name of the band, since they now have seven members!
Unfortunately they wouldn’t allow photos of their performance, as they’re in the process of negotiating a major recording contract, and they want their publicity photos to be released at the time of their first album! What can we say….?
But we did get sneak a picture of Marvelous Matilda…or was it Mavis….? You just can’t tell them apart, especially in costume!
Yes, the flamingos’ Mardi Gras party was a huge success! Did you expect anything less? And imagine our surprise when we came home the next morning (they did ask us to attend, since they were using our house – again – but we decided it would be much more fun for them to just have their flamingo friends at this particular bash!) and found several flamingos we’d never met sound asleep on our floor! It must’ve been a heck of a party!
And I’m sure they’re hard at work planning their next event….! Stay tuned!
Disclaimer: All content posted here is assumed to be in the public domain. If you find one of your images here and wish it to be removed please contact me.
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Yes, you read that correctly. I’m not talking about unconditional love. You know, the kind parents have for their children; or the love they’re supposed to have for their children.
The unconditional love we have for family, whether we agree with them or not, is what family has for one another. Or it’s what we’re supposed to have.
It’s not always easy. I daresay there are a lot of people who say they love their family, but they don’t like them. They don’t like their political or social views. They don’t like something they’ve said or done in the past.
But most often, if someone asks about that family member they’ll say they love them, but they don’t really see them any more because they’ve had a “falling out” and they’re waiting for the other side to apologize. Which isn’t likely.
But then there are other times when family members decide they want nothing to do with other family members, simply because they won’t do what they want them to do. And because of that, they cut them off, refuse to see them or talk to them, because they won’t do what they want.
We’re talking adults here, not children. And we’re talking especially about parents and their children. Parents who try to control their children long after they’re grown, many times with children of their own, simply because they want them to do what they want, in return for their version of love.
That is not love. That’s control. And it does nothing but destroy family relationships. Parents insisting that their children, or grandchildren for that matter, do what they say or else, instills feelings of abandonment, resentment, loss of self esteem, or the inability to form lasting relationships with others.
Why should they care about others, or why should others care about them, because if they do something wrong, something the other person doesn’t like, then that person or persons will discard them like a useless pile of trash.
That is what we call conditional love. “I love you as long as you go by my rules; if you don’t, then I don’t want you.”
And that is so far from love, I don’t even have words to describe it.
I’ve seen it in a number of natural or dating relationships in which one person attempts to force the other to do what they want, regardless of their partner’s feelings. That’s bad, and it’s a form of emotional abuse. Which no one should ever have to put up with.
But what about when it’s a parent or grandparent who acts that way to their children or grandchildren? That even worse. Parents and grandparents are supposed to love their children and grandchildren whether they agree with their decisions or not. They can give advice to those who are older, but making their love or acceptance contingent on doing certain things isn’t love.
It’s control, or conditional love, which can be taken away as quickly as it’s given. And it’s not healthy for either side of the spectrum.
I’ve seen this far too often in family relationships. And almost always it results in broken families, broken relationships, and children, cousins, nieces and nephews, or grandchildren being estranged or emotionally damaged because of no fault of their own.
Parents, grandparents, and other family members, this message is for you. If you’re doing this, stop
It. Look at it from the other point of view. How would you like to be treated that way? Or even more, if you were treated that way, how did it make you feel?
And if you are honest with yourself in admitting such actions made you feel bad about yourself, why are you doing this same thing to people you’re supposed to love? Why are you continuing the cycle of emotional abuse?
Conditional love isn’t love. It’s control; a way of making you feel important by making others feel unimportant. And it gets you nowhere.
Parents, love your children. Treat them with respect and love. Guide them but teach them to make their own decisions. So they’ll be able to teach their children the same things.
Unconditional love is the key to those relationships. You cannot put a price tag on love.
If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. In fact, you’ll never even have a chance, because nothing is ever handed to you on a silver platter. No one is ever going to come up to you and say “You look like you deserve this……” and just give you something for nothing.
If you don’t ask, the answer will always be “no”. And you’ll forever wonder why you never get what you want.
If you don’t step forward, you’ll always stay in the same place. And everyone else will end up in front of you. Because they stepped forward to accomplish what they wanted.
If you always keep imagining yourself in another place, another job, another relationship, but you don’t do anything to make it happen, it never will. Good things do come to those who wait, but you have to do your part to make them happen.
If you don’t follow these rules, you’re most likely going to miss out on what you’re waiting for.
All of these behaviors do nothing to build someone up, to make them want to be a better person. Instead of leading by example, you’re making people feel worthless, incompetent, and destroying whatever self confidence they once had.
All because YOU want to be seen as a power figure, someone important. Someone who knows so much more than anyone else.
And why is that? Could it be that you’re really not all the confident and self assured? That you don’t want anyone to know you don’t have all the answers? That someone else may actually have a better solution for a problem than you?
Why do you always have to be right? Why do you always have to have the final word?
A true leader doesn’t need to resort to the tactics I mentioned in the beginning of this post. A true leader leads from strength, concern for others, and by listening to those around them, and letting others speak what they feel without fear of reprisal.
A true leader is respected, not feared. They don’t try to bully others into doing what they want.
And this is true in your personal relationships as well as business situations. While there should never be a “leader” in a relationship, since a relationship is a partnership, neither partner should try to make the other do something using any of the methods listed above.
Look at yourself closely. Are you using any of the negative tactics mentioned above? And if you are, don’t you think it’s time for some self-evaluation?
Which means you get there a little at a time. Not all at once.
Others may get there ahead of you. And it’s not because you’re not good enough, or not trying hard enough. It just may not quite be your time.
The others that get there before you may actually not be ready to be there. They may have taken a few shortcuts, stepped over others, in order to get there. And as a result, they won’t be successful there because they aren’t truly ready.
You’ve probably heard the saying that “slow and steady wins the race.” Think about that.
You’ll get there as long as you kept trying. One step at a time. Patience. Another step.
A work in progress isn’t finished in a shortened time span. It takes the time it takes.
Hurrying something along only makes it take longer to complete.
And when that work in progress is completed, you’ll realize it was as all worth it.
And you’ll find yourself suddenly living in the land of regret.
Sure, you may be devastated because your significant other just broke up with you, but that doesn’t mean you have to quit your job and move to another town where you don’t know anyone and start over because you’re afraid people will talk about you.
You may be angry at your employer, angry enough to quit your job to “show them how much you’re” needed”, but all that does is make you unemployed with no immediate job prospects and no hope of a good reference from that former employer.
Or you may be upset because of the way you thought one of your friends was treating you and decide to tell them exactly how little you think of them. Only a day or two later you discover you were wrong, and lost several of your other friends because of your actions.
Uncomfortable or life-altering situations occur in our lives more often than we’d like. And our first reaction to such situations is often anger or in some cases devastating heartbreak, as in the loss of a close loved one. At those times we’re not thinking rationally, and our thought processes are turned upside down.
We’re not able to totally comprehend the gravity of what may have just happened, let alone think clearly enough to make permanent decisions based on what happened. Because the next few days may start to clarify things that will enable you to make more rational decisions.
We’ve all heard stories such as this, like the woman who thought she’d caught her husband cheating, and went home and destroyed all of his clothes, his important papers, and told his employer what she’d supposedly “discovered”. Only to find out the woman she’d seen him with was a travel agent helping him book a surprise vacation for their anniversary.
Farfetched? Not really. Most of us have been in or heard of similar instances.
Our emotions can easily get the best of us when we’re angry, stressed, or facing a difficult situation in which we can’t see a way out. Making permanent decisions when we’re in that frame of mind are a recipe for total disaster. And if you sign your name on the dotted line, there’s usually no turning back.
The lesson here? Don’t make major, permanent decisions until you really think them through. A day or even better, a week or two, will give you a cooling down period in which you can determine the best way to handle your particular situation.
Because if you don’t, you’re most likely going to regret it.
If we knew what the future held, we might have made different decisions.
Which would have changed what our future was.
Think about that….
Think about some of the major events in our history which could have been so different if other decisions had been made. And the way history would have changed our world.
The Kennedy assassination. If he hadn’t gone to Dallas and ridden in an open car.
The Martin Luther King assassination. If he hadn’t stepped outside on that balcony in Memphis.
People make decisions based on what they know at the time.
A young girl finds herself pregnant and has no idea where to turn. She has an illegal abortion and ends up unable to have children.
A woman stays with her abusive husband because she’s embarrassed over her mistake of marrying him; until he throws her down the steps and breaks her back.
Then again, some decisions we make which we look back on with regret turn out to be the best decisions when we later think about it.
For instance, if I’d gone to law school instead of letting my husband at that time convince me I shouldn’t, I’d probably never have met my forever husband at that mall in Washington.
If he’d become an architect like he’d planned, instead of giving up because he hated geometry and decided to go into sales, he’d most likely have never been in that mall in Washington.
And, all that being said, we wouldn’t have our daughter Ashley or our two, soon to be three, grandchildren.
We make decisions every day based on what we know at the time. Some end up happily, and some we regret forever. Others, we realize after time, were not only right, but exactly what was meant to be.
If there’s decision you made years ago that you’re still regretting, think about all the things that have happened since that decision and what you would be missing today if you’d done differently.
Yes, there are some decisions that have a disastrous effect on the rest of your life, and some that made your life happier than you could’ve imagined.
But the decisions we make along the way shape our lives into what they are today. And they shape others we meet along the way as well.
And because of our decisions we’re exactly where we’re supposed to be at the time.
And if you’re trying to look at things in the dark, you’re not going to see clearly unless you turn on the lights.
If you’re always trying to find the worst in a situation or somebody, you’re going to overlook the best part because you’re trying not to see it.
If you’re going around thinking that something bad is going to happen at any time, it probably will, because you’re too busy looking for the bad and ignoring the good.
Nobody ever injured their eyesight by looking on the bright side of things.
No, you say. Not me. I couldn’t do that. I have no talent.
Or, why would I do that? I don’t like reading.
Or, I have no time to write. No desire.
But think about this. You are actually in effect writing. Because you’re writing your own story as you’re living your life.
It’s up to you to determine how the story goes.
Yes, there are always other people in your story who come along and complicate things, but you’re the main character, the one who deals with the complications and puts things back together. Or changes things for the better.
Their grand dessert finale was the traditional King Cake….flamingo style. Traditionally the King Cake is a round cake confection decorated with sugared icing in the Mardi Gras colors of green, gold, and purple. The cake itself may be colored as well, or it may contain apple, cream cheese, or other fillings. It usually contains a small figurine of the Baby Jesus, although today the figurines can be any number of different items. But only one, because tradition says that whoever gets the figurine in their slice provides the cake for next year’s party.
Unfortunately they wouldn’t allow photos of their performance, as they’re in the process of negotiating a major recording contract, and they want their publicity photos to be released at the time of their first album! What can we say….?