The Day After

It always starts with a different feeling in the air. The feeling that today is a new beginning. 

Until it all comes rushing back.

For too many, the day after brings back all of the sadness, the grief, the loss, and we find ourselves once again trying to make sense of it all.

The day after a joyous event is a day to rejoice in, and to look forward to the future. A day of planning and new beginnings.

But the day after a crushing event seems to be another day that will only end in more sadness. A day that we don’t think we’ll get through. A day that has a different kind of new beginning.

But somehow we get through it.

Because we have to.

Because there are others counting on us and looking for direction as to how to continue on.

And somehow we get through it with a strength we didn’t know we had.

Because an ending is also a new beginning. Not one we’ve necessarily looked forward to, but a new beginning nonetheless.

And somehow we do get through it and slowly start our new beginning.

One step at a time. One hour at a time One day at a time.

Until we get where we need to be in our new beginning. And we step out and start over

When the End Becomes the Beginning

Sometimes we go thru trials so hard it’s gut wrenching. Our knees get weak and we fall. We feel like we have no one to turn to.

Our priorities change because of the “ends” in our life.

But an ending always brings a beginning of something else.

A marriage may end, but maybe you and your spouse weren’t really happy together. Maybe he/she was cheating, living a life you knew nothing about. Hiding it so well no one saw it coming.

It may be the end of that marriage but it’s the beginning of a whole new adventure. No, it’s not always easy, but instead of feeling sorry for yourself and wondering how you’ll get through it, look at it as the beginning of your next adventure.

Which doesn’t necessarily mean you need to find a new partner right away. Find yourself first. Find out who you are and who you want to be. It may surprise you.

The end of a job isn’t easy either, especially if you didn’t see it coming. Especially if you’re not financially prepared. You’re most likely angry, embarrassed, scared, and/or wondering what your next step needs to be. And how you’re going to pick up the pieces and start again.

You could be depressed to the point of doing nothing. You could trash the company you no longer work for. You could do the old “I never liked it there anyway. They never appreciated me” routine.

Or you could take the high road. Get in touch with all your business contacts and start networking.  Re-do your resume, updating and highlighting your skills. Determine what you want to do and start contacting the companies that fit your goals. And set your own goals to make it happen.

You may suddenly become empty nesters, it may feel like the end of being a parent. Suddenly you don’t have the same responsibilities. Suddenly it’s just the two (or sometimes one) of you in a big sort-of-empty house. How do you adjust to that? What do you do? Do you downsize and start over or rearrange your new lifestyle?

Or maybe you’re retiring, ending a lifelong work career. Beginning a totally new lifestyle. Where do you even start? What are you going to do to keep busy?

There are so many more types of endings in our life. Some anticipated and some that are not. Endings with closed doors that cannot be opened ever again. Endings that are seemingly impossible to turn into beginnings.

But time can do that. Even a death in the family introduces a new beginning. albeit a painful one. Not one that was ever wanted, but one that almost all of us experience sometime in our lives.

Painful as it may be, endings always turn into beginnings.  It’s up to us to take advantage of those beginnings, and select the right one.

Endings are not the beginning of the end. They’re a beginning of a new beginning.