Category Archives: Encouraging Thoughts

Every so often we get discouraged. We all do; it’s part of life. And when that happens, sometimes we just need a word or two of encouragement, sort of like a jump start, to get us going; to make us realize that we can do what we set out to do. So try some of these.

You May Plan Every Step of Your Life

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But sometimes life happens. And you have to let life happen. Your plans don’t always happen the way you planned.

And change can be unsettling, sometimes scary. 

But once in awhile you have to let go. And take a risk.

Because if you don’t take that risk, don’t try to see what you can accomplish, you’ll never know what could have been.

Think about it. 

What if you’d ignored that phone call you didn’t really want to answer…you know, the one asking you to come in for an interview for a job you really didn’t think you wanted. But you were desperate.

And although it wasn’t what you’d planned, it turned out to be one of the best decisions of your life.

What if you’d turned down the person too many times who kept asking you to go out because every relationship you’d had turned out to be a disaster? What if that person had given up before you gave in and said yes?

And that person turned out to be the one you’d been waiting for all along and didn’t even realize it. And twenty years later you’re still together enjoying a wonderful life. Maybe not who you’d planned it with, but so much better.

What if you’d decided to give up on your dream to become a teacher, a lawyer, a doctor, or an author, and spent decades of your life doing something you really didn’t enjoy, while dreaming about what could have been.

You can plan your life. You can plan every step of it, and refuse to change one thing, but what if there was something more that you wanted, but were afraid to take a chance?

And what happens when the life you have is suddenly not there, or suddenly changes, and you have no idea what to do? 

You make another plan.

Life happens, and change comes knocking on your door when you least expect it. Sometimes it gives up and goes away to give that opportunity to someone else, and sometimes it breaks your door down and forces you to make changes you don’t think you’re ready for.

But life knows better than you do; better than we do. And in the end, the life you thought you wanted and needed, becomes the past, and a new life opens up for you.

Life had another plan other than the one you’d planned.

And you discover it’s the one you wanted all along.

Wanting Something

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…doesn’t make it happen.

You have to work for it to make it happen. It’s not going to come to you by thinking about it and dreaming about it. You can’t just wait for it to happen. You have to do something.

Yes, I’ve heard the saying good things come to those who wait. But I know people who’ve been waiting for years for that good thing to happen and it hasn’t. Because sitting back and waiting doesn’t make it happen, does it?

You have to take a first step in order to make it happen; to accomplish your goal. 

But first you need to define that goal. I don’t mean just saying you want a new job, or start a business, or find a new place to live, maybe lose weight, or find a new relationship.

Those are goals, but a goal can’t begin to succeed unless you have a plan.

Just wanting something, dreaming about something, don’t make it happen. Telling all your friends what you want to do won’t make it happen either.

You actually have to do something to make it happen. Step out of your comfort zone. I know it’s not easy, but if you want something bad enough, that’s what you have to do.

You won’t know what can happen unless you try.

And that first step isn’t easy. But the second is a little easier. 

And by the third and the fourth…you’ve got this!

It’s Sad When Someone You Knew

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Becomes someone you knew.

How often does that happen? Too many times as far as I’m concerned.

There are many reasons. People relocate to new places and meet new people. Interests change. Spouses change, making once close relationships uncomfortable.

It’s tough maintaining relationships today. But as we get older, we learn to appreciate those who stay with us, and those we reconnect with after several years.

Facebook and Instagram have helped me reconnect with people I’d sadly lost contact with over the years, which I’m delighted about. I may not see some of these friends often, because they aren’t living close to me. But we’ve rekindled friendships, which are important.

The sad thing is, many people I used to know who are living here locally are no longer people I know.

Oh, I know them. And we used to be close. But life changes, and we don’t even realize it until it’s too late and those friendships disappear, lost in a sea of being too busy or not really caring any more, or having such strong viewpoints on subjects we can’t even agree to disagree on. And the friendship is gone as quickly as it began.

And they become someone  that we used to know.

Fortunately, in my case, many friends who moved away are still close, and we see each other a few times a year, but talk or text regularly. Friendships that are still strong and growing.

It’s sad when people we used to know become just that. People we used to know. Maybe we were friends, but maybe we really weren’t. 

Maybe we never really knew them, because we now hear them say things we could never imagine them saying or even thinking!

Sort of hard to tell sometimes, isn’t it?

Age is Only a State of Mind

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Or at least it should be, in very many ways.

My mind is still in my 40’s, and sometimes my 30’s. My body is usually more in its 50’s. But my actual age is none of those. It’s older.

And my best friend is some 15 years younger than me.

Several of my female friends are happily dating, or married to, men 6-10 years younger than they are, which used to be something that just wasn’t done. Those women  used to be called cougars, but that’s a term I really haven’t heard much lately. 

Age is a state of mind as much as a date on the calendar. I know people who are in their 30’s who act like they’re in their 50’s if not older. And vice versa. 

For example, the majority of people in their early 70’s are retired. I’m still working a full time job and having a great time with it. I have no plans to retire yet. My husband still works 30-32+ hours a week and plans to continue working for another ten years or more.

As long as we’re healthy and enjoying our lives, what’s the point in stopping what we’re doing? After all, life is meant to be lived to its fullest as long as we can. And that’s what we, along with many other people in our age group, are doing. 

We know people who have begun second careers or even started a small business in their 60’s. Nothing wrong with that. If you’re able to do it, go for it! Although you may not be doing the same type of work you did in previous careers.

Many seniors are still active in sports such as tennis, bike riding, golf, paddle boarding and even surfing well past their 60’s. Not me, though, except for bike riding, but I never did the other activities anyway. My husband would still be playing tennis except for his pulmonary issues.

My family is known for its longevity. My mom passed away at age 94. Her oldest sister was about that same age, and her younger sister is still in fairly good shape at 95. My grandparents lived well into their late 80’s, and my mother’s dad was still actively farming the day he died at age 88.

Yes, I do think about my age at times, but I don’t sit and calculate how many years I may have left. That’s not my decision. When the Lord calls me home I’ll go. And not a minute before.

I hope to see my grandchildren at least graduate from high school, even though I’m 66 years older than our oldest grandchild. And with my health the way it is so far, I have no reason to doubt that will happen.

What I’m saying is, your age shouldn’t limit what you do. You may not be as capable of certain physical activities as you were several years ago, but as long as your mind stays active and alert, you’re still able to do a majority of the activities you always did; only maybe not quite as fast!

My advice to my “senior” friends? Live your life to the fullest. Enjoy your golden years. Do what you want to do rather than what others say you should do. If you want to take a chance, take it, as long as you know all of the things that could happen and as long as your loved ones support your decisions.

Personally, I’m enjoying my life, and I’m nowhere near ready to quit what I’m doing. 

Who knows? I may write another book or two, embellish my jewelry making talents, or learn to paint, which is something I’ve always wanted to do.

As far as I’m concerned, the best is still to come. I have a lot more things I want to accomplish before I go home. And hopefully my husband will be with me as well.

How about you?

Every Flower Blooms

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In its own time.

It doesn’t rush; it doesn’t hurry because someone else wants it to bloom right now.

It doesn’t take in extra nutrients and water to hurry the process along because it knows that would alter or even destroy the beauty that is to come.

It doesn’t fear the storms around it that may threaten the growing blooms because it knows those tiny buds are formed for a specific purpose and they are also designed to withstand those storms.

It doesn’t worry that not everyone will appreciate or even enjoy the beauty that emerges, because it was specifically designed for that one special touch of color and design that will make its area of the garden a more special and perfect place.

But only for a time. The time may be short, lasting only a day or so, or it may last a week or even two. And when it’s time, its beauty begins to fade.

It doesn’t begrudge the fact that its beauty begins to fade; it changes as it ages, as it’s designed to do. There’s even a special beauty in a drying bloom that sometimes only it’s creator appreciates.

But even as that bloom prepares to die and return to the soil that nurtured it, it spreads its seeds that will become more blooms, just like it once was.

And the flower lives on through its descendants, which grow and bloom in its image.

And in their particular appointed time.

But My Door Won’t Open

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We’ve all heard the saying “when God closes one door He opens another.”

I believe it.

However, it has to be the right door. Not just any random door that comes your way.

We’ve all had it happen. A door closes, either suddenly or over time. We try to re-open it. We pull and pull on that doorknob to no avail. Then we think maybe we need to push instead. 

So we push and push. We bang our hands and even our shoulders against it, knowing that if we try long and hard enough, it’s going to open.

We get discouraged and stop trying and begin to walk away. Then someone else comes up to that same door and easily pushes it open. They walk through it and before you can get there to follow them in, it closes again!

Why? Why didn’t it open for you, and why did it open for them?

Did you ever stop to think that maybe it wasn’t your door?

Sometimes we think we know exactly what our next steps in life are supposed to be. We’re sure of it. Do sure that we work to make it happen. We work so hard sometimes that we lose sight of the fact that maybe we’re working TOO hard to make something happen.

And working too hard probably means it’s not supposed to be happening that way.

We’re all impatient at times, some of us more than others. We see other people getting the things we so desperately want, and wonder when it’ll be our turn? 

Their doors opened. Why didn’t ours?

Very simple. It’s not our turn yet. Our door hasn’t appeared because what’s behind it isn’t ready yet. It’s not time, as much as we want it to be.

Timing is everything as we’ve heard so often. It’s just not always our timing.

That door will be ready for you to open and it’ll be easy to open. No key needed. And when you step through it, you’ll know it’s yours, and you’ll know the wait was worth it!

If You Put Off Making A Decision

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It’ll be made for you. 

And it might not be the one you would have made for yourself, except you hesitated. Didn’t want to deal with it.

But if you put off making a decision you really need to make, because you’re afraid to make the wrong decision, you’ll be stuck with a result that you’ll have to live with for a long time.

It may be a decision you’d have made much differently, but were hesitant to decide one way or another. 

So now you’re stuck with the consequences.

Consequences you caused because you wouldn’t make a decision. Isn’t it better to live with the consequences of a decision you made, instead of one you refused to have a say in?

What Chapter Are You In?

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I read this several months ago, and it really touched my heart:

“Life is like a book with many different chapters. Some tell of tragedy, others of triumph. Some chapters are dull and ordinary, other intense and exciting. The key to being a success in life is to never stop on a difficult page, to never quit on a tough chapter.”

~Unknown

As an author who published her first book of over 20 chapters several years ago, I started thinking about those chapters. Some encompassed a brief few hours of time; some spanned over several years. But each represented an important and vital part of the story. Most were extremely difficult to write, but vitally important to the entire story.

Every book has a beginning, a middle, and an end. Each book starts out with a premise, an idea, or perhaps a dream. Each book ends with either the fulfillment of the dream, the culmination of an idea, or the result of believing in the premise of your life goal.

But does our life ever turn out like we think it will? Do our plans and goals ever turn out like we want them to; like we planned them to? Or does something happen along the way to change them, re-route them, or perhaps totally derail them and force us to start over again with a blank page?

It happens all the time. You’re going along in an easy chapter, with everything going for you, everything going right. And then, bam! A job ends. A marriage ends. There’s an unexpected serious illness. A death in the family.

And a new and most likely difficult chapter begins. One that’s not easy to write, because there are so many unexpected turns and twists.

There’s one big difference between real life and a book. Real life doesn’t always have a happily ever after. We want it to be so. And we work hard to make it happen.

But we also have to remember that if we followed the characters in that book into real life, that happily ever after has just as many ups and downs as in our real life. Because a book has a set ending. It’s not real life. Our lives end when the Lord says our time is up, and the final chapter is written.

So what chapter are you in? And how do you want to try to write the ones you have left?

Think About Taking That Chance

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Because most likely it won’t come around again. At least not in the same form.

Some things only happen once. If you don’t reach out and grab it, most likely it’s gone forever.

And you’ll be left always asking yourself…”what if…?”

And that’s a question none of us can really truly answer. Because we can’t know what we have no way of knowing.

Waiting

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It’s probably one of the hardest things many of us can do.

And I’m not talking about waiting for your order to be delivered at your favorite restaurant. Or for a movie to begin that you’ve been wanting to see for weeks.

I’m talking about anticipating something happening. Maybe we know when and maybe we don’t. Either way it’s not easy for a lot of us.

We wait to hear back from a job interview that we really want. They say they’ll let you know soon. But soon seems to take forever and that whole time you’re wondering what the answer will be.

You’re waiting to hear back on an offer you’ve put in on a home. You really, really want that house, and it seems to be taking forever to hear back from your realtor to find out if that offer has been accepted.

Maybe you’re waiting for a marriage proposal from that special person you’ve been seeing. You want it to happen NOW, and perhaps you’re worrying if it’ll happen at all. Or you’re waiting for the person you just met the other night to call you like he/she said they would. And it seems to take forever.

Or you’re waiting for a doctor appointment that you’re dreading. Maybe because you’re having problems and symptoms that you know could end up in a bad diagnosis. Or you’re possibly facing surgery that you need but are really scared to have, even though everyone says it’s nothing, a piece of cake!

Maybe a loved one is very sick, and you’re extremely worried that every phone call, every text message, may bring bad news. News that you’re expecting but not wanting to hear.

Or you’re waiting to find out the results of a pregnancy test; worried about what the results will be. If you don’t want to be pregnant that’s a lot of worries. If you’re trying desperately to get pregnant with no success so far, that’s even harder.

Maybe you’re waiting for a call from a friend who promised they’d call or text you so you can get together and catch up. You keep waiting, and waiting…bur there’s no call…

Or you’re waiting for your spouse or child to come ho,me and it’s late; past the time they’re supposed to be there. You wait and worry about what’s wrong and it’s even worse because they’re not answering their phone.

Waiting isn’t easy. You worry. You wonder. Your mind goes crazy imagining all sorts of things…good and bad. You’re anxious. You can’t sleep.

Yes, I’ve been there. I’ve been there myself and I’ve been there with family and close friends. It doesn’t get easier. It’s hard. People say to have patience. Well, that’s not always easy to do in certain circumstances. 

I remember a few months ago after I’d had my annual mammogram and the imaging center called and said I had to have it redone because the tech saw some tissue that didn’t look right. I got the next available appointment which was 5 days later. Five days to worry; deep inside I knew it was ok, but it didn’t stop me from worrying and counting the hours until the appointment. And yes, it was ok. But still, the waiting was awful.

Children have a hard time waiting for Christmas to come, or for their birthdays. But as adults, the things we find ourselves waiting for are far more serious than those we wait for as children. But in a child’s mind those things are just as major as the ones we wait for as adults.

It’s all a matter of perspective.

Waiting is never easy. It’s stressful, and it’s not fun. But we all do it. We have no choice. There’s nothing instantaneous in this lifetime.

But most times, what we wait for turns out to be worth the wait. Many times it doesn’t seem like it, because what we wait for may not happen the way we want it to. However, most of the time the end result of that wait turns out to be positive. Although we may not know it at that time, and it may not be what we expected.

And yes, sometimes the answer isn’t good. But we have to deal with it and handle it the best we can. That’s not easy either, but that discussion is for another time.

Are you waiting for something? Impatiently or patiently? Impatience won’t make it happen any quicker, you know.

We all go through it. We’ve all been there. But what you’re waiting for will most likely be worth it when it happens. Even if it’s not quite the way you expected.

Life Doesn’t Come with a Remote

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You have to get up and change it yourself.

You want to change the direction your life is going? Wishing won’t make it happen.

Waiting for something to happen won’t make a change. Because it’s all up to you.

It’s your life. You’re the only one who can make a change.

There’s no remote control for this one. You just have to get up and do it yourself.

Life Doesn’t Stand Still

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It’s constantly changing. 

So why are you trying so hard to stop it?

You don’t like change? Well, neither do I.  But it’s a part of life. And it’s what makes it interesting.

Life isn’t static. Would you really want it to be? Sure, there are moments we want to keep, want to last forever, but that isn’t how it works. 

Maybe you really want your life to stay exactly like it is. The same thing day after day. Never moving ahead. No surprises. 

But no excitement. No adventure. Nothing to look forward to. Nothing new happening. I don’t know about you, but to me that sounds really boring,

Is that really what you’re looking for? Staying with the status quo? Day after day after day…?

As much as I don’t like change, I don’t want static and mundane. I want to be challenged. I want to move forward.

Yes, there are risks, but that’s all part of life. If you don’t take a risk once in a while, you’ll never know what could have been.

Change is a part of life. You wouldn’t want your children to stay the same age forever, any more than you’d want to stay the same age forever. Sure, getting older does have its downsides, but that’s part of life as well. Those of us in certain age groups joke about being 39 and holding, but you can’t hold on that age forever! Except in your mind.